This sign clearly states that if you have laser eyes you are not allowed to shoot them out the window @ a fire/smokescreen.

This sign clearly states that if you have laser eyes you are not allowed to shoot them out the window @ a fire/smokescreen.

I scared the snot out of this girl cuz she wasn’t paying attention.. Let that be a lesson kids if your not watching me I will hit you with a dinosaur growl.

1st person to buy my new album @ my show! There was much rejoicing…

1st person to buy my new album @ my show! There was much rejoicing…

Went to a bucs game today.. Not sure what was sadder.. The final score or that fact I’m still wearing a 3xl jersey that I bought in 2002.. How did your team do today?

Went to a bucs game today.. Not sure what was sadder.. The final score or that fact I’m still wearing a 3xl jersey that I bought in 2002.. How did your team do today?

Finally got my new album in the mail! Oct. 21 in stores & online everywhere! (It features everyone & anyone who is awesome also..)

Finally got my new album in the mail! Oct. 21 in stores & online everywhere! (It features everyone & anyone who is awesome also..)

As an Italian-American I find all the “super Mario” comments highly offensive last night during my bball game..

As an Italian-American I find all the “super Mario” comments highly offensive last night during my bball game..

Relationship status (with chicken): it’s complicated

Relationship status (with chicken): it’s complicated

I like to show my watch to kids & tell them this is an ancient object from a long lost civilization called “vinyl”.  They scrunch up there face & ask me if it can’t be streamed on spotify..

I like to show my watch to kids & tell them this is an ancient object from a long lost civilization called “vinyl”. They scrunch up there face & ask me if it can’t be streamed on spotify..

Yes it is.. It translate as “how to make yourself feel like your dying in 5 seconds” any cardio junkies out there?

Yes it is.. It translate as “how to make yourself feel like your dying in 5 seconds” any cardio junkies out there?